...Thoughts...

Thursday, April 05, 2007

` 2:10 AM

I dunno why but my mind kept thinking about her tonight..

Perhaps its the awkward silence in my corridor..Perhaps its just some wildful thinking in my mind..

Talked to her...tears rolled down beneath her weary eyelids..

She cant speak now neither can she see me.

I told her i am here, right beside her, and droplet came rolling down.

The nurse told me that she is sedated and is unconscious to help her breathe more easily, but her sense of hearing is the last to be lost even when she is not in conscious state.

I know she heard me talking and singing to her. She heard my prayers. She heard my encouragement.

And i know what she would say. How she would say it. The expression on her face if she could express herself. The tone she would use. The manner she would tell me how painful it is.

I know it all too well after taking care of her for so long.

How i wish i could revert back to then visiting her at bethany everyday, doing physio with her after my classes.

I wouldn't mind all the rushing from school to there and to school again.
I wouldn't mind her grumpiness at the pain in her knee.
I wouldn't mind at all her complaints about the food and how come i was late.

I wouldn't mind at all.Rather than seeing her in this state.

I know she heard what i said to her everyday. Even if she couldn't acknowledge it.

And i know He is always with her every single second even when i am not.

Trusting and keeping faith and believing isn't easy. yes it isn't easy at all.

But its only when u trust that ur limited abilities is overshadow by His limitless power.

Trying.

Trying very hard.

~Mr Jen has spoken.